i couLd handLe it iF i was doWn..bUt 2 haVe 2 PCs crashiNg dOwn oN me is liKe maJor bLow!! definiteLy doubLe depressioN!! (D3..*hee*) tenK gaWd for noN-permaNence. 1's recovereD whiLst d werK pC is awaitiNg deLiverY frOm sTan, d comPuter maN (gEe, thaT rhyMezz..).. =P
iTs mondaY, and a soOn-2b tuesdaY; i'M doubLy hiGh todaY. duNno whY. haaa. i tinK you couLd feeL d enerGy in my liNes so far. HaaA!
i'Ve been feeLing greaT. suMhow i've restoRed & rejuVenated my energY for werK: i'Ve compleTed reporTs after repOrTs; doiNg loaDs of mY casewerK admiN & contactIng cLientz & pLanning what to do nexT. juZ hePi and prouD of myseLf. (",)
watChed musiC & lyriCs wif gerLfreNs dis eveniNG.. suCh a suWeet, cheesY, huMorouS in a laMe kinDa waY muVee. *heE* go watcH it peopLe. hecK waD d reviEws saY!
i'Ve posTed my faV sonG froM d muVee on dis bLoggiE. yeah, goNna b my soNG of d weeK for a few weeKs it seeMs. *griNzzz*
Way Back Into Love - huGh granT & dreW barrymOre
I've been living with a shadow overhead I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed I've been lonely for so long Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on
I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away Just in case I ever need em again someday I've been setting aside time To clear a little space in the corners of my mind
All I want to do is find a way back into love I can't make it through without a way back into love Oh oh oh
I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine I've been searching but I just don't see the signs I know that it's out there There's got to be something for my soul somewhere
I've been looking for someone to shed some light Not just somebody just to get me throught the night I could use some direction And I'm open to your suggestions
All I want to do is find a way back into love I can't make it through without a way back into love And if I open my heart again I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end
There are moments when I don't know if it's real Or if anybody feels the way I feel I need inspiration Not just another negotiation
All I want to do is find a way back into love I can't make it through without a way back into love And if I open my heart to you I'm hoping you'll show me what to do And if you help me to start again You know that I'll be there for you in the end
i loVe d sonG! and d muVee! and DreW and huGh! hEe!!
Yes, theSe are d uPdatEz for nOw! wHeEEEeEEeee~ 2 moRe daYz to bangKoOK!! *smiLing froM ear to eaR*
-thOughTz sPoKen @ 2:58 PM :)
budaK LelaKi loronG beLakanG.. erKk.. budaK jaLan beLakaNg.. erKk.. =P
Monday, March 12, 2007
mY thaNks to my coLleague zaK foR triGgerinG a bLast tO d pasT swiTch. HurHurHur.. reLivinG d teeNy bOoper daYz. yeS, suM say, dey can'T sing, suM saY deY're gooFy or wadEva. But @ suM point in d pasT..adMit it.. we DIG theM.. =P
n yeaHz..saMe soNg buT wiF suM moVes. i'D ratHer theY juz sinG thaN danCe as weLL... ;o):
-thOughTz sPoKen @ 5:28 AM :)
saWadee-Kha!!!
iTs aLmost mid-March. So FaaSsstTtt!!!!!
buT nevatheLess...aM looKing forwaRd tOoo:
a LiL' trippIn' to winD dowN & shOp wiF 4 of my besT maiTezz.
as daYs pass, as tiMe catChes uP wiF me, aS d werLd sumhoW gets smaLLer..i juz waNna wondeR:
waD makes a sPouse seeK aNother, apaRt froM his or Her owN partner?
iS d d Loss of intimacY & affectiOn in hiS or her oWn marriaGe? iS it negLect froM him or her owN spouSe? is it puRe temptatioN? is it fLaws in d partneRs?
whaT is an affair? is it mereLy a matter of lingO? suM knOw it as 'infideLity' or 'adulterY'. suM saY its juZ 'hanging oUt', 'swinginG around', 'nothing serioUs' or a 'oNe-nYt stand'. or is it a mAtter of perceptiOns? wiFe sayS 'goinG out wiF thaT womaN freN of yours'is an affaiR or husbaNd saYs 'thaT maLe coLLeagUe keePs wHo messaginG you is ur boYfreN'. d liSt caN jusT go On & oN....
Geez. theorisTs say theRe are 5 tyPEs of ExTra maritaL affaiRs:
ConflicT avoidanCe affairs
IntimacY avoidanCe affairs
sexuaL addictiOn affaiR
exiT affaiR
spLit seLf affaiR
Read HERE, in caSe u'Re curiOus waD thiS (mostLy) seLf-expLanatory jargoNs meaN. n trusT me, in thiS agE, not onLi meN do thiS. woMen dO faLL intO the 'traP'.
d natUre of my werK is such thaT itS a doubLe edGed sworD: itS both a bLessinG & a hazaRd toO. i sEe d siDe of socieTy hiddeN behinD d concRete waLLs of modernisatiOn & ecoNomY. i sEe d subconsciOus functioNing in individuaLs. i sEe weaKnessEs coVereD by d achieveMents demandeD by socieTy. i sEe d unfortunaTe sideLineD by todaY's systeMs. i sEe d unexPecTed; and d werLd beiNG reaLi smaLL..i sEe peopLe froM my owN sociaL circLe, pasT & presenT & probabLy futurE enterinG my worK spheRe wiF theiR shaRe of difficuLties.
i coUnt my bLessinGs 'coS oThers' Life experieNces are eye-OpeneRs & becoMe my besT teachers. howeVer, meetinG & hearinG storiEs of thoSe famiLiar tO mE..aT tyMz, leaVes me appaLed & disappoiNted (dependiNg on d issUe of course).
a recenT revelatioN/discoVery thaT sum1 i respecTed & his other haLf weRe in d midsT of divorce procEedings. d reasOn: d exTra affaiR wif suM1 way mucH younGer than his aGe. n i begiN to wonder whY.
oF koS, its noNe of my business hoW peopLe run their marriaGes or reLate to each otHer in d marriaGe or deciDe d way to gO in their marriaGes. juZ thaT in my werK, weN u'Re so usEd to meetinG stranGers & hearinG their stoRies & werkinG togetHer wif theM to maKe thinGs righT agaiN.. thaT weN storiEs froM near distances emerGe, it bcoMes oh, so cLose to d hearT.
d news was mind-bLowing. it tOok me awhiLe to let it sinK in. Ya, it seeMs thaT i'm haVing doubLe standardS in my accepTance of whO d probLem coMes to. buT heY, i'm humaN. sumhOw, i dO get over my disappointmeNts aFter seLf-theraPy & discussiOns wiF coLLeaguEs whO heaR my raNts & shaRe their thougHts as weLL.
hearinG storiEs of affaiRs: brinGs reaLisatioN oN d vaLue & sanctitY of marriaGe, thaT it reaLi taKes a Lot of werK to maintaiN it for years & years. no douBt, Allah wiLL determiNe d fate of ur marriaGe. buT @ leasT, humanLy efforTs haVe beeN iNvested into d marriaGE.
is it aLL bLeak aFter an affair is reveaLed or discoVered by the spoUse? yeS & no. suM deciDe to throw in d toweL after d hurT & paiN of d discovEry. suM turn oVer a new leaF. suM refleCt on hoW botH husband & wifE havE contriButed to d probLem & deciDe to wOrK on d marriaGe. sUm enD up experienCing d mosT lossEs @ d end of d daY - losinG botH spoUse & d affaiR that he/sHe's had.
fwaaAah..heaVy & depressiNg coFFee taLk for a saturdaY morninG.
i haVe to nOte thesE tOtz doWn nevatheLess.
is ModernisatiOn corrodiNg our vaLues on marriaGe & threaTening d institUtioN of familY? or is it juZ a matteR of personaL choiCe??
whaT becoMes of d fuTure?
-thOughTz sPoKen @ 12:34 AM :)
dNa anyoNe?
Saturday, March 10, 2007
thiS is so keWl... =D aN inexpensiVe waY oF retrieVing uR "dNa". kwaKwaKwa.
tHe curreNt featUred soNg on dis bLoggiE - totaL ecLipse of d hearT. d One u heaR on d bLog is covered by westLife. originaL song by boNnie tyLer:
to tuNe in to boNnie's versiOn, paUse d pLayer on d lefT coLumn. (",)
TotaL ecLipse of d heaRt
Turn around... Every now and then I get a little bit lonely, and you're never coming round... Turn around... Every now and then I get a little bit tired, of listening to the sound of my tears... Turn around... Every now and then I get a little bit nervous, that the best of all the years have gone by... Turn around... Every now and then I get a little bit terrified, and then I see the look in your eyes... Turn around, bright eyes Every now and then I fall apart Turn around, bright eyes Every now and then I fall apart
Turn around... Every now and then I get a little bit breathless, and I dream of something wild... Turn around... Every now and then I get a little bit helpless, and I'm lying like a child in your arms... Turn around... Every now and then I get a little bit angry, and I know i've got to get out AND CRY Turn around... Every now and then I get a little bit terrified, but then I see the look in your eyes... Turn around, bright eyes Every now and then I fall apart Turn around, bright eyes Every now and then I fall apart
And I need you now tonight, And I need you more than ever, And if you only hold me tight We'll be holding on forever, And we'll only be making it right, 'Cause we'll never be wrong... Together we can take it to the end of the line Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time... I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark We're living in a powder keg And giving off sparks!!! I really need you tonight!! Forever's gonna to start tonight Forever's gonna to start tonight
Once upon a time I was falling in love But now I'm only falling apart There's nothing I can do A total eclipse of the heart
Once upon a time there was light in my life But now there's only love in the dark Nothing I can say A total eclipse of the heart
Turn around, bright eyes Every now and then I fall apart Turn around, bright eyes Every now and then I fall apart
Turn around... Every now and then I know you'll never be, the boy you always wanted to be... Turn around... Every now and then I know you'll always be, the only boy who wanted me the way that I am... Turn around... Every now and then I know there's no-one on the universe, who's magical and warm as he is... Turn around... Every now and then I know there's nothing any better, there's nothing that I just wouldn't do... Turn around, bright eyes Every now and then I fall apart Turn around, bright eyes Every now and then I fall apart
And I need you now tonight And I need you more than ever And if you only hold me tight We'll be holding on forever And we'll only be making it right 'Cause we'll never be wrong Together we can take it to the end of the line Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time I don't know what to do I'm always in the dark We're living in a powder keg And giving off sparks I really need you tonight! Forever's gonna to start tonight Forever's gonna to start tonight
Once upon a time I was falling in love But now I'm only falling apart Nothing I can do A total eclipse of the heart
Once upon a time there was light in my life But now there's only love in the dark Nothing I can say A total eclipse of the heart A total eclipse of the heart A total eclipse of the heart
..Turn around bright eyes ..Turn around bright eyes, turn around..
woAhhh...is it marCh aLredi? gEeezZ..jaNuary seeMs liKe onLi yesTerdaY. aaRghhhh!! sO faSttt...
yEs..yEs..i knOw d bLog lOOks ratHer baRe fOr d pasT monTh; liKe a deserT missiNg d raiN (isN't thaT a soNg in d 80s?? sOng in my heaD: N i miSs u...babY..liKe d deseRt miss d raiN...lalalalala...theRe's such a soNg ryTt??).
sO wheRe haVe i beeN? feBruarY was a kiLLer monTh, wiTh moRe werkiNg saturdaYs whicH i wiLL foreva reMember 'coS my braiN & energY weRe sqUeezeD drY of enerGy & thinKing ceLLz. *faJ fainTz juZ at d recoLLectioN of thiS* (nOw d spiCe gerLz soNg is in my heaD: too Much..of suMting is bad enUf, bad enufffff....erMmm, yeaH?) i tinK i goT a littLe...Ok i'M kiddiNg myseLf. i tiNk i goT qUite demoraLised by werK diS monTh. yA suRe, i diD cLaim suM tiMe oFF frOm werK to resT bUt iT was juZ short resPite b4 i hiT anoTher weeKend of werK.
feBruarY was hectiC; a Lot of thiNgs weRe goinG on - i feLL sicK for 2+ weEks: d ruNNy nOse, feVer & koFf stUck to Me for liKe d loNgest periOd eVa in my entirE liFe; toNnes of traiNing/proGramme to atteNd & conducT; weddinG preparatIons; n in d midSt, i waS tryiNg to squeeZe in tyM for a goOd resT. n Ya, gOt to sPent pretty gUd tyM wif deAr whO's cLearinG his leaVe ryT nOw. YeaH, 4 d 1st tyM siNce we goT togeTher, he'S saYing "apa maU kerJaaa?" for a chanGe. kweKweKwe.. =P
i tiNk i got Lost in aLL thaT's goiNg on. MarcH beGan on a NegatiVe nOte cOs i feLt striPPed of aLL mY enerGy for werK. ya, i kNow taT souNds baD. but honestLy, i'Ve neVa feLt sO, sO negatIve abOut werK in my entirE life. i pusHed myseLf to werK & 2b productiVe @werK 'cOs frOm daY 1 i chOse dis caReer, i beLieved thaT iT was my caLLing & thaT i was meanT 2do thiS. n deN i reaLised thaT pushiNg maDe me moRe.... tireD.
theRe u haVe it, faJ was wOrn out, REALLy worN out froM werk (sumtinG whicH peoPle knOw, rareLy haPpens to faJ) & juZ weN aLL d tireDness & negativitieS weRe pushing her doWn...sHe atteNded a wOnderfuL trainIng sessiOn which saLvagEd her moraLe & beLief aBout her professiOn. (",) iT was d 'arT of couPle theraPy'; bUt tO me, it was mOre thaN thaT. sumting about d traiNer, sUmting abOut d storieS he sHared meant a LOT to me. n i'M gLad thaT reLuctanCe was eLiminaTed bY inspiRatioN & neW resoLutioN.
sO..."d problem is Not wif d danCers, but the daNCe itseLf..". i shaLL keeP these weRds in my heaD & cHange mY daNce to a mOre manageabLe rOutiNe. i shaLL sLow dOwn my temPo & beaTs; but exPreSs sTeadY mOves & stePs..& enjOy daNcing... =D tenX moscHe!
firSt d werK. nexT, d lurVe. weddiNg prePz are weLL oN d waY. yeS..i'Ve beeN extRa on d baLL wif regaRds to weddiNg prepz aFter receiviNg disaPpointments frOm sum of d servicEs thaT i wisH to enGage. i diN nOe peoPle r liKe uLtra kiaSu to booK stuFz waY damN earLier thaN me. Neva miNd, lessoN learnt. reGret i shaLt nOt but pro-acTive i shaLL b. Move oN & prePare 4d weddiNg i shaLL!
n weddiNg prePz CAN b potentiaLLy stressfuL.. but hoNestLy...iTs reaLi, reaLi, fUN!!! (='o'=) caN't wait caN't wait caN't waiT!!!!!! wHeEeeEEEeeEe~~~ caN't wait 2b missUs, caN?? ;o)
waD's nexT... erMmm.. bangKok triP diS end mOnth. yaayYy! i'm goiNg oN a Lil' triPPin' wiF my 4 otHer sLacker maitEzz. Look out foR d amaziNg tHai experieNce oF 3 gaLz & d twiN taWerZz diS eNd of d mTh. freT not, i'LL spLash d bLog entrY wif loaDz n loaDz of peeKtureZ! nOW diS, woUld definiteLy b greaT theraPy fOr me fOr aLL d theRapies thaT i'Ve doNe! hiaKhiakhiaK..
ok...HeRe's a Lil' sumting to sHare about mY werK:
HurHurHur... =P
kwenG kweNg.. beTta not leT brudder sEe thaT. *griNzz* fOr mOre sociaL werK humour, poiNt yOur cursOrs HERE.
wad eLse is New?? oh yeS, d cRaze between a feW laDies @ werK. we sociaL werKers haVe a neW hobbY: peeK-vidIng!! kweKwekweee.. www.peekvid.com is a HAVEN HEAVEN foR muVee-goers & sEries staLkerz liKe Us. N my laTest oBsessiOn, apart fOr greY's anatoMy:
.HerOes - thE seriEs.
leMme shOw u MY herOooZ:
SantiaGo CabreRa as iSaac meNdez..d torTured artisT whO caN see d futuRe..
Masi Oka as hirO d Hero. d One tHat caN beNd tyM & spaCe. yeS, i wiSh i couLd do tHat! =P
i'M totally hooKed on d seriEs! waD wouLd you dO if u woKe up 1 mornIng n foUnD out thaT u haVe sOme speciaL abiLities - to fLy, to seLf-heaL, to read peopLe's minD, to walk thRu' waLLz, to See d futuRe?
falling hearts
