i feeL reaLi gUd weN cLients shOw suM insigHt & understanding intO their owN actiOns & their circUmstancEs. tHis, besiDes many othEr reasOns iS whY werK is a rewarD for Me.
@ d aGe of 25+ comiNg to 26 & manaGing a chuNk of maritaL caSes, i feeL as if i'Ve beeN taKen on a roLLer coaSter riDe. d joUrneY wiF d couPles & spoUses i haVe been seeinG saW me experienCe: frustratiOn, anGer, joY, appreciatiOn, ponderiNg, contempLatioNz, amUse-meNt, puzzledneSs.
aNger: @infideLities, irrespoNsibiLities, d lacK of acknowLedgemNt towaRds spoUses' efforTz...d lacK of resPect sPouses show towaRds each otHer.
frustRated: weN d despeRate housewiFe doEsn't seeM to geT d poiNt thaT d probLem is Not d exaCt probLem.
aPpreciatiOn: towaRdz reNewed conviCtionz to werK oN marriaGes despite d darKness surroUnding theM.
contemPlatiOnz: oN how spOuses caN acT, feeL & tiNk d way they do sUmtymz; oN whetHer i woUld pracTice wad i preaCh to cLientz in manaGing my owN relationshiP.
puzzLed: bY d vaLue spOuses attriBute to their marriaGes; or hOw a marriaGe is uPheLd despiTe nuLL vaLue lefT. wad theN is d meaNing of marriaGe??
aMused: by antiCs of spOuses trYing to geT on eacH other's nerVes of finDing eacH otHer's fLaws.
THESE i assuRe yoU, caN Be potentiaLLy lethaL & hazardOus to d miNd weN preseNt in overwheLming shOts.
lisTening to wiVes & husbAnds ventiLating, watchinG their commuNicatiOn stanCes towards eacH otHer, heariNg the stoRies of their marriaGes faLLing & breaKing dowN..mY hearT fiNds great reLief & feeL moRe @ eaSe weN spOuses deciDe to giVe theiR marriaGes a 2nd gO despiTe d storMs & choPPy waTers their love boaT had to 'waDe' thrU'.
tHis wouLd meaN an accepTance of d staTus quO despite uncertainty of chaNge froM d other haLf of d dyaD (if i werK wiF onLy 1 spoUse); diS wouLd aLso meaN thaT couPles decide to refLect on pasT actiOns & werk towaRds d future betterMent of their reLationshiPs; thiS wouLd seE d spoUse acknowLedging that chanGe taKes tyM & he/sHe shaLL prevaiL enduriNg d spoUses' idiOsyncracies & certaiN (baD) attituDes & behaviOurs.
sOme r super gung-Ho & aLL for it. soMe saY yes wiF gustO but actioNs speaKs otherwisE. soMe shoW accepTance which graduaLLy bcOmes a facaDe..& its back to squaRe 1: d comPLains, d disagreeMents, heighteNed dissatisfactIon.
weN maK said that "naK kawiN meste ade modaL.". i'M sure she meant it figurativeLy & literaLLy as weLL. iF taKde modaL, no waY u can werk thRu' issUes, manaGe expectatiOns, coMMunicate effectiveLy, accept ur spOuse & appreciaTe deM for their strengThs..
seeiNg marriaGes @ sucH cLose encoUnters..is marriaGe preparatiOn in itseLf foR me.. fOr d moMent, i tinK it woUld suffiCe to saY thaT marriaGe is abOut d hOws:
How tO maNage iT & hOw to pLay your roLes as spOuses effectiveLy;
How Far yoU wouLd ruN or waLk d distaNce to maKe d marriaGe werK..
AND
hoW LonG yoU visiOn yOur marriagE to Last.....if tiLL d enD of tyM is ur goaL..to d eNd of tyM d marriaGe wiLL endUre..
& of coUrse, wiF bLessiNgz & guidaNce from HIM.
marriaGe IS hard werK. so How??
-thOughTz sPoKen @ 4:10 PM :)
i See, i heaR..
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
i See a woMan desperaTe to saLvaGe a marriaGe.
i heaR heR monoLoguE:
it duN mattEr if theRe is no More Love. it duN maTter iF he Loves soMeone eLse. it duN maTter iF neitHer maritaL bLiss nOr happiNess is wiThin reacH.
as loNg as i haVe diS tiNg caLLed marriaGe to hoLd on to.
it maTTers to me thOugh... how caN oNe hoLd on to suMting thaT haS neiTher meaNing noR vaLue? how caN one breaThe weN aLL vitaL sigNs of Life is inevitabLy fading awaY? is whaT u'Re doinG a sacrifiCe? whOse sacrificE is iT?
wiLL desperatiOn driVe a sPouse, oR anY otHer huMan beiNg to do simpLy anitiNG?
i dO Not undersTand. maYbe i do Not want to understaNd. i do Not want to imaGine beiNg in suCh a positiOn. i fiNd it raTher..unfathOmabLe whY & hOw oNe can acT in suCh a manneR.
wouLd i b ThaT woMan i sEe...wouLd i hoLd on to sumtiNg thaT badLy eveN thOugh aLL hoPe seeMs diM?
wouLd i?
wouLd U?
i kNow liFe werKz in straNge maNnerz.....aNd thaT it Can maKe liVing beiNgz dO d mosT unpredictabLe actiOnz @ tyMz...
thaT woMan couLd be Me.
i sEe her. i heaR her.
-thOughTz sPoKen @ 3:15 PM :)
PleaAsee...teLL me hOw to...
....hiDe d freaKing trUth weN i aLreadY kNow it?
HOW do i Juz preteNd thaT i dO not kNow??
hOw dO i burY bacK d caN of wOrmz i've oPeneD....??
HOW?? HOW nOW???
HOWWWWWWWWWW???
-thOughTz sPoKen @ 3:00 PM :)
d gOod oL' daYzz
Friday, January 19, 2007
i juZ lurVee weddiNgz @ d viLLage. d atmosPhere is... bYond werDz. bLessed i aM to haVe a paRent whO haD lIved @d otHer siDe of d caUsewaY. eVen thOugh i diN grow uP feeLing d kaMpong atmosPhere ('coS my famiLy moVed to a fLat once i was borN), @ leasT i haVe reLatives in maLaysiA to compensaTe for thaT. *hee*
lasT weeKend was my kuzziN's weddiNg. i wAs so hePi to see her aLL doLLed uP & gLowing wiF radiaNce. iNah , her elder brO & sisTaz weRe my pLaymaiTez eacH tyM maK broUght me doWn to paK ngaH's pLace. we played catch, 'tenG2', pOndoK2..squeezeD aLoe veRa leaVes onto our faCes (koNon2 for smooTher skIn =P)..thOse were d guD oL' daYz.. i miSs thaT. so simPle & carefrEe..(",)
weLL, despite d weaTher & suM frustratiOnz wif particuLar grpz of peopLe whO weren't heLping out, d weddiNg was a bLast. iT was greaT meetiNg reLatiVes i'Ve not meT b4, aNswerinG aLL d queriEs about d fiancE & d Big daY, bicKerinG wiF zaM, inaH's eLder bRo (we haVen't meT in awhiLe d loNgest tyM), n of koS, oggLe2..hAa.. =P oKie, juz a teeNy weeNy bit of thaT. *grinzz*
beeN awhiLe siNce i'd directLy been invoLved as a weddinG functiOn's heLp. makLumlaH, tHere has Not beeN a weddiNg in d family since eOns agO. tHUs, i caN't waiT fOr novembeR to coMe! =D
oKie, suM piCz oF nieCes, nePhewz, sibLingz & relatiVes for yOur viewiNg:
oH ya, of couRse, whO couLd forGet d ramLi sariP overdoSe i experienced @ d weddiNg.. *faJ fainTzz*
-thOughTz sPoKen @ 12:21 AM :)
a passinG remarK or a criticisM?
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
perhaPz, it has got to a poiNt wheRe everYthing i saY is perceiVed or raTher seeN, to Be a criticisM.
a reMark i paSsed becaMe a point of conTentioN aLbeiT, I had more (positiVe) tinGz to saY. But No!
i Am criticaL. sO i am & i shaLL be.
giVen thaT, i reserVe d ryT to nOt contiNue sharinG my otHer thoTz sinCe my 'criticisM(s)' was/weRe under scrutinY.
so frOm dis daY, i shaLL speaK weN necessarY or weN i am asKed. my owN thoTz r pureLy my owN to contempLate.
perhaPz my tyM has passEd. perhaPz, i'M aLredi on my owN.
i aM tireD. n maYbe, juz maYbe, aM begiNning to loSe it.
*siGh*
-thOughTz sPoKen @ 11:30 AM :)
leT me huMour Me:
Friday, January 12, 2007
Haaaaaa......pLease arh. juz let me posT dis heRe. suddenLy remiNded of my stinT in indOn; i had a daNgduT khaKi doWn der. crazY siA. we actuaLLy tuNed in d inDon channElz to hear her siNg & watch her ngeBor. gaWd.
goyaNg dOoong... asiKkk!!!! ya amPuuUuunnN!!!!!!!!!!!
wundEred hw daTo' S feLt haVing her soNg danGdut-iSed.. kwekwekwe..
gaWd..lOok @ her outfiT.
for a more interestiNg cLip, cLick ur cursOrs heRe. =P
-thOughTz sPoKen @ 4:15 PM :)
iT has officiaLLy begUn....
Yes. it has oFficially beGun. i tinK now i'M more or Less readY to shEd off d loVehandLes & exTras on my body. haaAA.
consuLted mY personaL traiNer-cuM-dietiCian (*Hee*) and it haS begUn. toDaY marks d 4th daY i'Ve beeN on veGgies & fRuitZ meaLz; peppEred wiF tUna & sprinKled wiF raiSins fOr suM meaLz. tenK gaWd for d 1000 isLand dressiNg, & yeaH..i beTta cuT dOwn d dressiNg doSe a biT. secuKUp rasa sahaJa yer? hiaKzhiaKz.
aFter sendiNg bacK d caR lasT mondaY, i hoPPed oVer to giAnt suPermarT to purcHase suM iteMs: tuNa in waTEr, veGGiez & fruiTys, raisiNz, macarOni pacKz + spaghetti saUces. diN nOe it was so fuNN untiL i staRted out oN it.
iTs not taT bad u Noe? dieTing & weiGht manaGement isN't abOut starviNg or maKing urseLf suFfer. its aBout eatiNg d ryT proPortiOnz & beiNg creatiVe wiF ur fOod. sO, i'm enjoYing it.
tiNk i'm quite psycHed up to diEt thaT d miNd is sO benT on nOt snacKing. i aLmost puKed aFter eatinG 2-3 foRksfuL of a coLLeaguE's cheeSecaKe. Not thaT it taStes awfuL, juZ thaT i'Ve conditionEd myseLf not to snaCk in betweeN meaLz. taT surprisEd me. kaLau duLu maiN lantaK sahaJa. *griNzz*
d cuTe tiNg is, suM coLLeaguez r aLso joiNing in d saLad eatiNg. hiLarioUs i teLL u! its liKE i've sTarted suM epideMic @ D OfIS. READ: sociaL werKerz on eatiNg striKe. [sO, paY us More!!] kweKwekwe.. bUt yeaH, its fuN to haVe feLLow comraDes joiNing d quesT for a healThier lifestyLe.
nexT, i'd beTta staRt on d daiLy haLf hOur exerciSes. diS a reaL challeNge 'coS i juz caN't seeM to leaVe my preciOus bed in d mornIng. ;o) bUt i shaLL moVe aheaD & do wHat i haVe to. i wiLL, i caN & i shaLL! CharGeeeeeee!!!!! kicKboxiNg lessOns staRt next weeK. yaYynesss!! i shUd osO staRT ruNning on weeKendz duN u tinK? =D
No more exCuses, faJ!!
sO, praY harD my freNz; fOr i aM werKing hard to geT back to my weiGht bacK in my sportswOman daYz....insyaAllah.
yuN ciPot muz heLp me hoRr!!! (",)
-thOughTz sPoKen @ 3:40 PM :)
iTs a siGn..
Saturday, January 06, 2007
i juz realised tHat i've not posTed abOut my Kl getawaY down heRe.
pFffT. taNda2 betoL. tanda2 ketuA-An. Haa!
sO, in summarY it was aLL shoPpinG, reaLi2 sLacking, long hOurs of traveLLing tiLL my boNz got craMped & yeaH, not mucH tinKing 'coS i leFt my braiN bacK hoMe. Haaa!!
shoPping Loot: cheaP buT aLmost reaL jerseYz, bLouses, baGz, sandaL, sacchaRineLy suweeT jubah. *hee* spoiL myseLf siLLy!
besT fiNd: "siaKap stiM". [soUndz so ryT, but so wroNg? =P]
beeN a loNg tyM since we caM-wHored...
theRe u haVe it, my Lil' trippiN' to kuala lumPur after mUch anxietieS 'coS of d fLoodin' in M'siA.
waS pLannin' for a triP to bangkok due in enD jaN. n daNg, deN d boMbinG had to haPpen! gaWd...tanDa2 laGik.
perhaps beTTer pLans r linEd up 4me (a baLi triP laTer on meBbe?) or simpLy a siGn to nOt shOp buT saVe? *griNzz*
*siGh* terkiLan tk paT p shoPpin' kaT bangKok... lalalalaa....
stOp it faJ!! cLear d loaD od werK 1st b4 eveN dreaMin' abOut spendiN' bucKz! kwaKwakwa..
aarGhhh.. repotz due today & mosT, in facT, ALL of uS havE not started yeT... tiDaaaaaAAKkkKKkk!!!!!!!!!! *ahaKzz*
-thOughTz sPoKen @ 12:10 AM :)
i shaLt endeavOur
Friday, January 05, 2007
iN a nutsheLL, i aM reNewiNg my voWs [*ahaKzz!!*] to fuLfill the foLLowing:
- trY 2b as uPdated as possibLe wiF my Case Notes. my lovE-haTe relationshiP wif CasEs, neVa-enDing! i waN d daYs of stOred scribbLed paper 2b oVer. foR thaT, i probabLy neeD to taKe suM daYz of Leave & do a maraThon by lockIng myseLf uP in my rOOm@hoMe. leMme checK out d daTes besT to do ThiS....
- eXerciSe@leaSt thriCe a weeK & shEd suM kiLos...i haVe tO & i muZ! hoPefuLLy to See suM weighT off by June diS yeaR. gaWd..wiLL powER..coMe...to..ME!!!
- cUt dOwn on snacKing. i tiNk oNce u werK@d oFis, u teNd to..sNack!! i shaLL keeP snacKing to juZ RAISINS + FrUitz!
- keeP my tabLe @ d Ofis & mY roOm @ hOme LeSS messY. i trY Ok? can't heLp it...i werK besT in a meSS. [gee, thaT rhyMes!]
- sticK aroUnd in d kitchEn & graB my mothEr's cooKing skiLLs@ leasT once a weeK. weeKendz pLease??
- noT b tOO hot-headEd, especiaLLy to d peopLe i loVe. i duNNo y, but deY juz hapPen to sEE d wersT of Me. =S sorrY peopLe, i trY ok? no mattEr what, i stiLL lurVe y'aLL!
aNd to accompLish d foLLowing, i shaLL endeavour:
- taKe uP guiTar lessOns
- dO suM traveLLing, or @leasT see & discOver places i've neVa beeN to
- atteMpt to jiggLe my bOnz@beLLy daNcing
- havE loads of fuN & keePin' uP d enerGy prepariNg for my weddiNg
finaLLy, i'D d heaRt to chanGe to a neW blOgskiN!! i lurVed d preViouS sKin to biTz; wiF d fLowerZ & purpLish hUes..whiCh gerL wouLd haVe d heaRt to deLete it off??? hwaHwahwa..bUt yeaH, stiLL, i decideD to do d impossibLe. maKe suM changes!!
So, nEw yeaR, a neW looK foR my bLoggiE!! WheeeEEneSss~~
"You can dance anywhere, even if only in your heart." ~Author Unknown
n wiF thaT..i pLan to daNce arOund moRe dis yeaR....gUd tyMz, or baD tyMz..to daNce i shaLL & i wiLL! (",) tHat waY, i enDeavOur to keeP uP d positiVity in d midSt of aLL d chaLLenges liNed uP for me diS coMing yeaR. (insyaAllah...i hoPe i'D b abLe to keeP up thiS attituDe.)
i shaLL not attemPt to chanGe d fOnt coLours foR my previoUs posTs. i shaLL begin coLour-coordiNating my fontZ wif d bLogskIn starTing frOm diS posT onwaRdz. hiaKhiakHiaK.
seeMz liKe yestErdaY that i juZ did ceRtain tinGz: feLL in loVe, crasHed & burNed, traVelled, got my heaRt broKen, reCce-inG for weddiNg iteMz.
2007's heRe..bIg eveNt aheaD for Me @d eNd of thiS yeaR. d maJor hi-Lyt thaT i wiLL b LooKing forWard tO @anY tyM dis yeaR.. *griNzz*
nOw, i Need to fiGure waD's nEw & waD needS to Be (re)neWed.
giMme a moMent yeaH?
"Human beings, vegetables or comic dust; we all dance to a mysterious tune intoned in the distance by an invisible player." ~ Albert Einstein
-thOughTz sPoKen @ 12:45 PM :)
loVe & liFe....
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
weLcome aBoard 2007..
waD of Life's meaNingz wouLd you b searchiNg for this year? wad oF loVe would yoU be seeKing foR?
CurreNt tuNe:
arti kehiduPan.
Ku menempuh sedalam lautan Ku mencari arti kehidupan Mendaki gunung kekecewaan Melelahkan
Kau menjelma seperti khayalan Kau impian dalam kenyataan Perjalanan yang penuh likunya Kini t'lah tiba di sisimu selamanya
reff:
Engkau bukan yang pertama Tapi pasti yang terakhir Di cintamu kutemui arti hidupku(2x)
Kau menjelma seperti khayalan Kau impian dalam kenyataan Perjalanan yang penuh likunya Kini t'lah tiba di sisimu selamanya
to reff
Creditz to my Fren, mR rudY dJoe for puttiNg togeTher this greaT pieCe, & of kOs..for d greaT vocaLz!! to vieW more of his great werkz, droP by HERE
falling hearts
