a waNdereR's Love

hOw faR, how Long, hOw to??

Saturday, January 27, 2007

i feeL reaLi gUd weN cLients shOw suM insigHt & understanding intO their owN actiOns & their circUmstancEs. tHis, besiDes many othEr reasOns iS whY werK is a rewarD for Me.

@ d aGe of 25+ comiNg to 26 & manaGing a chuNk of maritaL caSes, i feeL as if i'Ve beeN taKen on a roLLer coaSter riDe. d joUrneY wiF d couPles & spoUses i haVe been seeinG saW me experienCe: frustratiOn, anGer, joY, appreciatiOn, ponderiNg, contempLatioNz, amUse-meNt, puzzledneSs.

aNger: @infideLities, irrespoNsibiLities, d lacK of acknowLedgemNt towaRds spoUses' efforTz...d lacK of resPect sPouses show towaRds each otHer.

frustRated: weN d despeRate housewiFe doEsn't seeM to geT d poiNt thaT d probLem is Not d exaCt probLem.

aPpreciatiOn: towaRdz reNewed conviCtionz to werK oN marriaGes despite d darKness surroUnding theM.

contemPlatiOnz: oN how spOuses caN acT, feeL & tiNk d way they do sUmtymz; oN whetHer i woUld pracTice wad i preaCh to cLientz in manaGing my owN relationshiP.

puzzLed: bY d vaLue spOuses attriBute to their marriaGes; or hOw a marriaGe is uPheLd despiTe nuLL vaLue lefT. wad theN is d meaNing of marriaGe??

aMused: by antiCs of spOuses trYing to geT on eacH other's nerVes of finDing eacH otHer's fLaws.

THESE i assuRe yoU, caN Be potentiaLLy lethaL & hazardOus to d miNd weN preseNt in overwheLming shOts.

lisTening to wiVes & husbAnds ventiLating, watchinG their commuNicatiOn stanCes towards eacH otHer, heariNg the stoRies of their marriaGes faLLing & breaKing dowN..mY hearT fiNds great reLief & feeL moRe @ eaSe weN spOuses deciDe to giVe theiR marriaGes a 2nd gO despiTe d storMs & choPPy waTers their love boaT had to 'waDe' thrU'.

tHis wouLd meaN an accepTance of d staTus quO despite uncertainty of chaNge froM d other haLf of d dyaD (if i werK wiF onLy 1 spoUse); diS wouLd aLso meaN thaT couPles decide to refLect on pasT actiOns & werk towaRds d future betterMent of their reLationshiPs; thiS wouLd seE d spoUse acknowLedging that chanGe taKes tyM & he/sHe shaLL prevaiL enduriNg d spoUses' idiOsyncracies & certaiN (baD) attituDes & behaviOurs.

sOme r super gung-Ho & aLL for it. soMe saY yes wiF gustO but actioNs speaKs otherwisE. soMe shoW accepTance which graduaLLy bcOmes a facaDe..& its back to squaRe 1: d comPLains, d disagreeMents, heighteNed dissatisfactIon.

weN maK said that "naK kawiN meste ade modaL.". i'M sure she meant it figurativeLy & literaLLy as weLL. iF taKde modaL, no waY u can werk thRu' issUes, manaGe expectatiOns, coMMunicate effectiveLy, accept ur spOuse & appreciaTe deM for their strengThs..

seeiNg marriaGes @ sucH cLose encoUnters..is marriaGe preparatiOn in itseLf foR me.. fOr d moMent, i tinK it woUld suffiCe to saY thaT marriaGe is abOut d hOws:

How tO maNage iT & hOw to pLay your roLes as spOuses effectiveLy;

How Far yoU wouLd ruN or waLk d distaNce to maKe d marriaGe werK..

AND

hoW LonG yoU visiOn yOur marriagE to Last.....if tiLL d enD of tyM is ur goaL..to d eNd of tyM d marriaGe wiLL endUre..

& of coUrse, wiF bLessiNgz & guidaNce from HIM.

marriaGe IS hard werK. so How??

-thOughTz sPoKen @ 4:10 PM :)